Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
