i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
