Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
