32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
