she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Green mimosas i think yes
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize