i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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