Don't make out with my wife yet
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
