If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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