If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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