You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
