I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
