I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
