I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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