woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize