His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
