i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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