reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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