you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
