i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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