I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
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