Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Randomize