my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
