Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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