I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
