i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
