just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
