I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
