I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
