Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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