She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize