I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
