After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
