i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
