O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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