their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
