Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You can't just leave with hair like that
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
