A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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