walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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