it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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