Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
