Sry I called you an 8
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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