Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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