the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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