We won't sleep together?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
