apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
