You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
