Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
