.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
