I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
