just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize